1. Learn to Love Your Shyness
Okay, okay I know what you are thinking. You believe your shyness is your downfall in the world of dating, and to a degree it is. But here is the deal. You are actually at an advantage to a certain point. You lack the arrogance other men have that drive women away. Believe it or not, there are women out there who love humble, a trait that accompanies shy. Yes, you need to work on some things here, but embracing your shyness and recognizing it as a good trait–even on a small-scale–should boost your self-confidence a bit.
2. Replace the Negative with Some Positive
Before you can hit the dating scene you must release memories of old dating disasters and the drama that resulted from them. You must believe that success in the world of dating is possible for you. Begin repeating positive affirmations to yourself every day, such as “dating is fun”, “dating is easy”, “I have an easy time dating” or “I have plenty of dates”. Before long you believe what you are telling yourself, you become more confident and happy and attracting women is much easier than it used to be.
3. Find Someone with Common Interests
It is much easier to go on a date with someone who shares the same interests as you instead of someone you may only have one or two things in common with. It is easier for you to talk to them, leaving fewer awkward moments in between. You will find it much easier to be yourself because you have no fear of being judged for your interests. If you do have times when you feel uncomfortable talking to your date, ask her an open-ended question about herself and let her do the talking for a while. This gives you a chance to gather your thoughts and calm your nerves.
4. Plan Ahead for the Date
While it is nice to be spontaneous, this can also result in dating disaster, something you do not need at this juncture of the game. First, plan the location. Until you have a higher level of self-confidence, pick a spot you are comfortable with. For instance, you may not want to take her to a romantic Italian restaurant where the pressure is on to keep conversation rolling and keep her entertained with your witty, shy self. Save this for the second date when you have come out of your shell a little. Instead, take her to a street fair or carnival. These are both fun and it takes the pressure off having to be perfect for her. However, make sure you know what the approximate cost will be.
5. Make it about her
Remember, you asked her out for a reason. There was something you saw in her that you really liked, and you know there is something in you she will like in return. If you make this date about her, you are sure to get a second no matter how shy you may be. Compliment her a little, but do not make it forced; do not let these compliments be fillers for lack of conversation. Allow them to come moments after a shared laugh when you are looking into her eyes. These are the most sincere moments, and she will realize this. These are the special qualities she will see in you as well. These are the qualities that will attract her to you.
